I remember the day so clearly.....

Although it seems pretty much like I've been a mom my entire life, that isn't the case.  Thing 1 didn't enter my world until 2003.  In fact, yesterday marked the nine year anniversary of the phone call that changed my world.  I remember being active on a yahoo group that tried hard to track when referrals had been released from China.  It was sketchy, but was all I had at the time.  When Thing 2 came into being, the whole system was different, but for Thing 1, it was a huge guessing game.  Her referral call was supposed to come in December and it didn't.  I distinctly remember the sadness that overcame that Christmas because I so wanted to be a mom by Christmas (not physically, just with the promise of travel to get my baby soon).  So, when referrals were supposedly out of China and arriving at some agencies in the US, I began to get the whole nervous stomach.

I was teaching that day and was sure I would be getting called from my social worker while at work.  I had no cell phone then so I was at the mercy of the school secretaries to connect me.  I do believe I checked in with them every half hour via email!  There was also a "situation" going on at school that needed an emergency meeting so some teachers went to an area restaurant right after school to discuss what we were planning to do.  Well, I left at 3:45 and the social worker called at 4.  I left the restaurant at 5:00 and when I arrived home there was a message from my social worker at 4:30 which simply said, "Cindy, I have some good news for you.  Please call me back. I've been trying to reach you for an hour." Of course, getting ahold of her wasn't as simple as she stated because she was a counselor too and was in session.......until 6:00!  Needless to say, longest hour of my life.  At 6:07 the phone rang and I was told my baby girl was 8 months old and the agency said she was beautiful, which she mentioned they normally don't comment on. She gave me stats and we got off the phone.  For a minute. I was literally on the phone until 11:30 that night calling people and answering phone calls.  I couldn't reach my mom, my sister or any brothers right away so I think my first to know was a friend and my niece who was in college at the time.  Thus, Thing 1 took over my world.

I'm pretty amazed by her. I know I'm biased, but she really is quite an exceptional kid.  Her talent in the arts is crazy, especially in drawing and creating.  Her desire to be a good person puts me to shame as she studies God's word and is very aware of those around her that are hurting or alone on the playground and she doesn't hesitate to step up and be a friend.  As a big sister, there is none better.  I see her frustration with life at times and I feel sad because I know that in her, I see me and that is certainly something I didn't want to pass on to her.  My goal for my 9.5 year old is to instill in her a sense of security the best I can, show her that loving God is the best decision one can make, and assure her that the family is the core of our being and no matter what lies ahead for her or I, we will face it together with the grace only God can supply and the undying love we've shared since she was handed to me on May 11, 2003 with boogers everywhere, the look of fear filling her beautiful eyes and screams of an internal pain leaving her mouth.  Man, I love that kid.